Introduction

Ladies and Gents,

Welcome to my blog. Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Megan and I'm 34 years old. I live in the cutest little touristy town in the heart of the Midwest called Cedarburg,WI . I live with my boyfriend, Andy and our babies--Little Bear and Little Buddy.

Quick synapse-bullet proof style

• I am a nursing student. 
• I work in a hospital as a Health Unit Coordinator (Ward Clerk) (Hospital  Unit Secretary).
• I am fascinated by science
• I have been obese my entire life-Also have PCOS/Hypothyroidism (Yay me!)
• I have a younger sister named Ellen. 
• My parents died when I was in my mid 20's.
• Prior to my relationship with Andy, I was married for 1 week shy of 11 years.
• Oh yeah, I am a self-proclaimed food addict! I love sugar/taste/texture of food and I find myself binging at times until I get that "STUFFED" feeling

I've been through some hard times, but I've been through some really great ones too.

In 2010, my heaviest weight tipped crushed the scales at 380 pounds. I am 5'10. I KNEW I had to do something to start living and stop existing.  In January 2011, I underwent Weight Loss Surgery and had a lap band installed. In a year's time, I lost almost 150 pounds. My lowest weight ever seen on a scale was 232 pounds. I am now bouncing around 280 pounds.

So, how do I feel about this? Mixed

I'm certainly  not happy that I regained 50 pounds of weight.

Factors why I gained 50 pounds: 

• My job went from a fairly active job to strictly desk work
• I was on Depo-provera for a year (gained 20 pounds on it the first month--and it also through my hormones completely out of whack)
• I quit smoking
• New love
• I had my band loosened so that I no longer throw up
• I love ice cream/chips/desserts
• I don't exercise (but I didn't before either)

 When I was  newly banded, I was so determined not to fail that I relied heavily on my band to do all of the work. I rarely exercised. I smoked.I rarely ate, because I had my band so tight that I was throwing everything up. I would throw up sometimes 10 times a day for days on end. I was dropping weight left and right and fell in love with all the compliments I was getting. It is truly a miracle that my band did not slip or that I did not cause permanent damage to my body. I was tired, dizzy, and even fainted a few times from severe dehydration, but I didn't care. I would look at pictures of myself in the mirror and be in amazement of my "success." I knew my behavior was destructive, but I didn't care.

My marriage was awful. We were married so young and my ex husband and I had nothing in common anymore. We fought constantly and money was so tight that I really was okay with not eating much.  We split in 2011. I was on my own physically and supporting myself financially. I started dating and again loved the new found attention for the first time in my life. Unfortunately, at the time, I didn't know it was not the healthy attention. I was so lost and had such low self-esteem that I basically threw myself at any guy that gave me a second look.

About six months after I split with my husband, I met my current boyfriend. We have been together a year now and I can honestly say I have never been happier in my entire life. He loves me for me. Our relationship is based on profound respect for one another and we encourage one another to be our best. When I met Andy, I weighed 247 on our first date. I remember it clearly because I had gotten a fill that day. I had pre-warned him that I was a "cheap date" and didn't eat much. I remember sitting outside on the patio, barely getting down some soup. 

Andy was a string bean growing up. He is 6'2 and was barely 140 pounds in high school and was super athletic. After meeting him, I dropped another 15 pounds or so, but it was not in a healthy way. He soon helped me to see how stupid I was being by not eating. 

My band is normal now. I have some restriction but I do get hungry. I still have to watch it because if I put my mind to it, I can eat anything. I generally stay away from red meat, although I had my first hamburger in the past 2 years, just last week. I have no issues with PB'ing (throwing up) anymore.My lab work is normal. My cholesterol and blood pressure is normal. I sleep well. For the most part I eat healthy, but I have to watch my grazing and my junk food.

So even though I have a lap-band. It is not magic. I am proof that I didn't pull my part of the weight in my journey and now here I am trying to lose the last 100 in the sensible way, but during this go at it, I'm using my band as a tool to remind me to eat slowly and chew, chew, chew and make healthy choices. I am also leaning towards joining weight watchers for accountability and additional weight loss support. So that's my honest story and I would love to have you around for the ride!

Here are some pics :)

                     

Me Pre-op Jan 2011 360 pounds right before surgery

Me May 2012 at 232 pounds--my lowest--a still shot from video-- Size 16w jeans

Me in March 2013 around 275 here

Jean size 34W to 18W

My love Andy, and I--May 2013

My 14 month old Yorkie--Little Bear (6 pounds)

                                    

My 4 month old Teddy Bear (shitzu/bichon) Little Buddy "Chubby Buddy"